All Men are Dog..

I will start this one off with a note for all the readers. I am neither an anti feminist nor a male chauvinist (I have deliberately removed the third word of this adjective ‘PIG’ as it might go against the elections commissions’ election code of conduct and I don’t want to get booked under NSA). Day before yesterday, I was hanging out with my friends and during the normal course of talk something came up which kind of offended me. One of my very good friends who happens to be a girl came up with one of the most famous feminist adjective for men: ‘All men are dogs’. Even I agreed to it a bit but I was completely against the generalization. There is an exception to almost all the rule in this world and here in this case the volume of exception is larger than the volume of rule itself. Realizing that out of the five of us sitting there three fall in that dog class, she clarified that you guys are not included in that category so don’t take it personally. That was soothing but not healing. I thought a bit and went off to sleep.
The next day we were at Costa café. This time we were four of us. One of the male parties was missing. So the ground was pretty even. Two from the dog class and two from the dog owner class. And this time something came up which was healing, which was so cool that I (any male) started loving to be called a dog. The phrase ‘All men are dogs’ is in itself a complement. After all dogs is the most loyal mammal on this planet. A dog never cares if you are black or white, if you are beautiful or ugly, if you are hindu or muslim. What it really cares is your well being, your safety, your happiness. The dog's visual system is engineered to serve the purposes of a hunter. They have amazing hearing and smelling abilities. Dogs exhibit social intelligence uncommon in other animal class. They take orders, learn things and execute it perfectly. They have been helping police and bomb disposal squads all across the globe saving thousands live every year.
Dog’s fidelity remains unquestioned. And when women convey this same message by saying ‘All men are dogs’, we men get furious. Change yourself guys. Don’t feel offended, take it as a complement. Your female counterpart is actually congratulating you when she says, ‘you are such a dog’. So guys be proud and be a dog.

The Love-Handle

Life becomes lethargic especially when you are working in an IT company and your tummy is growing leaps and bounds. Yes you got it right; I am going through a similar phase. My tummy growth is sinusoidal in nature. While I was in school, I was chubby (I don’t prefer to be called fat). Six packs or for that matter eight packs were not in fashion then, so life was not that tough. I move to college and then the mess food played its role. I lost almost 20% weight and then was in a position to call myself an owner of athletic body. Food was not the only thing to blame. I always kept myself busy in a lot of extra curriculars and sports, thus ended up getting a good body. Once I came out of college, the sinusoid started taking an upward trend. Two and a half years at TCS and I can again boast of having a well rounded tummy. I know the obesity is bad for health but then I am yet to reach that stage (I am yet to become a hamburger eating couch potato American). But still it feels sad at times that I have a tummy and I can not do much to get rid of it.
The emotion to get rid of this tummy was always there but no actions were taken even in this regard. But suddenly something happened and I started feeling proud of my prized possession. A friend of mine came out with a term (Not his invention but discovery for sure) to define the side lobes of this apple shaped structure and the term was LOVE-HANDLE.
A thorough analysis of this term and proposed benefits of this so called love-handle gave us a whole new angle to take our tummies as a boon rather than a bane. love-handle signifies that not only your are earning good but also are busy with your work. At this point of recession when people are losing job and those who are not losing are afraid that they might lose it soon as they do not have any work, this is one great advantage. Besides this the love-handle give you (read your partner) a great grip on you when you are doing some stuff together (don’t shy, you know what I am saying. Yes when you are walking together). I am falling short of space; else I would have written a lot more about the advantages of owning a love-handle.
So guys, if you have tummy, be proud. Boast. Show it off. Make those six packers jealous of the jewel that you own. You lead and the world will follow you.