Raashee

Why look for happiness outside when you can find it within. Funny huh!!! You will easily find such lines in Robin Sharma’s stupid motivational books or the Banyan Tree column of TOI. Most of the times, even I don’t care to either comprehend or even read such lines. But of late few things happened to me which kind of changed my perception.
Mid semester exams were on and I had already appeared for eight papers. One last was left. Six of us, the six most useless people assembled at institute building to discuss the contents of this last paper so that all of us pass. As even my condition in that paper was not very strong, I was fully ready to participate. And please don’t interpret that I was good at other papers, I was bad at almost all of them, it was just that this paper was just too haunting and I had already missed all the surprise tests. But before we could have started, my mom called me up and informed that my bhabhi was blessed with a baby girl. Now that was some news. For a moment the child in me woke up. I wanted to be at home and play with the baby. But the very next moment, the real I came into being. I enquired about arrangements, the hospital cleanliness, bhabhi’s health and a lot of other things. I went back to the assembly to discuss the paper, tried hard to concentrate but somehow could not for most of the times.
The very next day everyone was talking about summer placements. We were informed that some companies were lined up during the holidays and it is advised to stay back. For once, I thought of staying back. The thought was, cannot risk placements. If I go home, I might miss a chance. But then the baby girl was too strong a reason to go back home. And to be truthful here, someone else was also responsible here for my going home. And I am very thankful to that person for taking strong decisions and pushing me also to go back. I would have surely missed something had I not come home that day.
I, along with my brother, reached Bokaro at 12 in the night and the door of the nursing home where the baby was, was closed. So dad, bro and me went back home. The eagerness to meet the baby, see her, touch her grew even stronger. The next day, woke up at time and went to the nursing home to surprise people (My home coming was not known). I entered the room, and I suddenly realized I was in for a surprise, that now I was no longer the youngest member of my family. The first look of the child. It was not the first time that I was looking at a 1 day old baby, but then she was special. She was my brother’s daughter. My parents’ first grandchild. The first girl child of gen next of my family.
She came with a lot of changes. My bro became a father. Father, now that is some responsibility. Being a father meant that all the existing bonds from my bro to other family members grew a bit weak suddenly and she created the strongest bond with him at one go. I felt jealous. But she deserves that. My mom and dad became dada and dadi and suddenly started appearing a bit older to me. I became a chacha. Yet to figure out the responsibilities barring few known ones that I do daily like changing her dress when she pees or preparing milk for her or even singing for her to make hep sleep. But most importantly, my Bhabhi became mother. She is almost my age and we are more like friends. And I guess I am more mature than her but as soon as she became a mother, all the idea of I being more mature or sincere broke.i thought that as a mature individual, I can at max change a process, add profits or own a company but she just gave birth to a new life. A new life that can breathe, drink, cry, make noises and has a capability to grow. A new life which is so delicate that you are afraid to even touch her but still so attractive that you cannot stop yourself from doing that. Her eyes were closed when I first held her. Tongue was rolling and arms were folded tightly within. She was sleeping and there was no movement, but even then she was so attractive that I kept on staring at her. It was after some 30 minutes that she opened her eyes. I thought she was looking at me but it was the tube light that she was more interested in. She kept rolling her eyes for some time and then slept again. I was there with her for the next four hours and every small move of hers caused the same excitement as it did at the first sight. While coming out I realized that for the time I was with her, I did not think of anything other than her and happiness just paved in her path without me looking for it.