Love at First Site

Love at first sight..we biharis master it!!!
The concept of love at first sight is quite unique in itself. Though I am not a PhD in love or for that matter love making, but with the limited knowledge that I have about the topics, I understand that love is a mutual understanding between two people of opposite sex (now it can be same sex also, and Europeans lead us in this arena too) that they care for each other, they trust each other (on most of the things) and they will do whatever it takes to keep the other partner happy (though the meaning of ‘anything’ varies from time to time, place to place and person to person and offcourse gender to gender). The whole concept of love lies on the basic premise that it has to be ‘mutual’, and two people (or more if u want more fun ;) ) must be involved. So like a plain love, I mean love that happens after sometime when almost all the considerations about future financial, emotional and other such sick al securities are tested to its truest degree, love at first sight also requires two parties, and they should fall in love at the same time.
So considering that love at first sight requires two people to fall in love at the same time, that’s when they see each other for the first time, I thought of calculating the probability of such an event. No dude don’t get me wrong, I am neither a statistics genius nor a desperate research scholar. I talked about probability only in its subjective sense. Let us look into the process of love and see how difficult it is for common people to fall into love at first sight and how easy it is for a bihari.
The Common Man Situation:
A boy sits in the train. Lucky enough, he saw a girl sitting right next to her. This was the first time he got lucky enough to have a girl sitting next to him. And to quadruple the joy, the girl was beautiful, well dressed and very open (she started talking to him as soon as he offered her help in placing her luggage). For Dhruv Arora , a delhi born and brought up upper middle class no nonsense studious kid, this was more than a dream come true. Looking into his past record of having no girlfriends (the cuchy coo ones), two girlfriends (the normal lady friends) and IIT Btech background, he had to fall in love. He did all what it takes to pretend that he was the best available bachelor for the coming one and a half days of journey to pune and somehow managed to get her number also. Smart kid, he managed to meet her once at HRC, spent a lot of money to make an impression. Later that night they saw a movie also and then had their dinner at a Mexican restaurant. It all went fine till the next weekend when the girl sensed that Mr Arora was expecting something else out of her and she informed him politely that she was already into a relationship. Her boyfriend was an IIMC grad and a Investment banker with deutsche in Singapore. Poor Mr Arora, he lost a lot in these two days. He lost few thousands that he spent on her, he lost an opportunity to visit daman and diu with his friends on that same weekend and the biggest one was that he lost the love that he desperately wanted to have. And all this because he wanted it to be ‘mutual’.
The Bihari Guy Situation:
The first thing that a bihari will do is, remove the concept of ‘mutual’ from love. For them it does not matter if the other party is interested or not. Love happens as soon as you want it to happen. So the chances of love at the first sight increases many folds. Let us see the same story when it happened to Kumar Priyardarshi, a middle class patna born kid famous as PD among his friends. PD has killer looks, killer brains and killer instincts.
A boy sits in the train. Lucky enough, he saw a girl sitting right next to her. This was the not the first that he had a girl sitting next to him. And like it happened every other time the girl was beautiful, well dressed and very open (she started talking to him as soon as he offered her help in placing her luggage). For PD this was a cake walk. Looking into his past record of having N girlfriends (the cuchy coo ones), N girlfriends (the normal lady friends) and NITJ Btech background, he had to fall in love. He did not waste any time and fell in love immediately. Love at the very first sight. It never mattered to him if she was interested or not, she became his love interest the very moment. He did all what a BF should do for his GF (only help and support, no nonsense acts) in coming one and a half days of journey to pune and somehow managed to get her number also. Smart kid, he managed to meet her once at HRC, spent a lot of money to make an impression on his LAFS GF*. Later that night they saw a movie also and then had their dinner at a Mexican restaurant which the LAFS GF* liked a lot. It all went fine till the next weekend when the girl sensed that Mr PD was expecting something else out of her and she informed him politely that she was already into a relationship. Her boyfriend was an IIMC grad and an Investment banker with deutsche in Singapore. Mr PD, the smart chap immediately dumped her as his LAFS GF* and clarified that it’s ok with him. They became best buddies in the coming months. PD fell in love with a lot of her other friends also. He never lost anything. To him all this was more of an opportunity cost. For example in this case also he just spent a few thousand on his LAFS GF* and then kinda dumped her. Come on GF dumps BFs and vice versa, that is common and don’t calculate all what u spent on her as loss. Though he missed the trip to Daman, his weekend was great. They had an awesome time at poolside bar at a 5 star hotel in the city itself. And the best part is, he was in love for fuc***g 15 days man.
I just lost what I wanted to prove and don’t have the patience to read or write any more, so guys take a break. Put in your comments. It motivates and discourages me, based on whether the comment is positive or negative. So write whatever u want to write, I damn care....if I get time, I will write again!!!!!

PS: LAFS GF means love at first sight girl friend.

December 2009...Life of a Prince

B schools at IITs are awesome. Apart from the world class infrastructure, faculty, studies, placements and blah blah, the best thing that they offer is a one month winter vacation. Mine started on 28th Nov. During the 1st week of December I visited Ranchi to meet a newly married friend couple and later attended a friend’s marriage. And both these events created confusion in my mind. Confusion that either I am growing old or they were in hurry. Anyways. The best part of the vacation was my visit to my relatives in UP. I visited Gorakhpur, Varanasi, Deoria, Bhatni, Sajaon and few other places which will sound alien to you( I know that even the last 3 were more on that alien side of the spectrum but they are for my memory aid). I met almost the whole family on my maternal and paternal side and there had been a lot of positive changes and facts that I came up with. I’ll try to enumerate a few of them:
1. I am loved by a lot of people; in fact by people whom I don’t even know or remember. I should take more care in knowing them in future.
2. Now I understand that why my dad insisted on my not staying for long at my maternal home. Coz that the best place to spoil yourself. This time around also I got a Princely treatment. I almost spoiled myself.
3. I got a huge demand out there dude.
4. Suddenly I realized that I should be calling and talking to a lot of people with whom I never talked in past.
5. You should not chase things, things will come to you. Just be patient.
6. Time and place control your behaviour.
7. You are being constantly being watched so try living up to the expectations.
8. Laptop is your best companion.
9. Bhojpuri is an awesome language.
10. One can live even without internet but mobile phone is a must.
I don’t remember much now as this all happened around 10 to 15 days back. Buy anyways, this trip was amazing. I realized that there are lot of people who like and love me and I should love them in response. I should immediately stop taking care of people who don’t take care of me coz that the only way of channelizing the energy in correct direction.

Months before the 1st sem end

I have not been blogging for quite some time now, to be precise, after mid sems. MBA takes a lot of time off your life. This might sound a myth but this actually is a reality. MBA, not the studies though, takes a lot of time off. Anyways. I’ll try to recollect all what happened to me in the last two months.
This past two months came will a lot of changes. Changes both on the professional front and personal front. Lets talk about the professional changes first, personal ones always take a lot of time. Professional changes were started with my selection as summer intern at VentureEast, a venture capital fund LLC co located in chennai. My post midsem summer internship journey started with interview at deloitte IT and continued with interviews at Heinz operations and KPMG IT and before the KPMG results my VentureEast interviews happened. A place comm. member informed that I got my VentureEast interview at 2. I came to hostel and helped Srikanth prepare his CV till 1.55 and then rushed to the interview room. As this was a telephonic interview, so no worries about dressing. The co was offering an amazing profile, sort of analyst and fund manager for one of its startup fund called BYST but I did not want to go to this company and the reason being that I wanted a big brand to join and was very hopeful of the KPMG entry. But destiny wanted me to be in Chennai in hot summers and thus VentureEast selected me even when the interview was the worst that I ever had in my life (you don’t always pause for 5 minutes on a ‘tell me about yourself’ question in an interview ). This selection led to a 3 days of pseudo depression. But then things improved when I looked back status of summer process at campus and compared my profile with others. I was more than happy. This selection brought about one more change also, I got more interested in finance in particular and studies in general (though the latter was just for few days). Two professional disasters also happened. Once where I won a VGSOM organized national level B quiz and other when I (or rather we) dropped the plan of participating in CFA challenge. Who cares anyway.
Personal changes were rather bigger in number and more satisfying and devastating at the same time. Friendships grew stronger so did the affection. My patience got tested on a number of occasions and but I guess I sailed through smoothly. Days before semester end saw some very rough patches, but somehow it all went well with time. At times you need to let things go and ignore at the same time to correct things. But ignore situations, not people. Ignoring people you love not only hurts then but hurts you also. Anyways it’s better that I do not go on writing a drama here.
All in all the last semester was a great learning experience, personally and professionally. I guess next sem will see a new me in all aspects of life. More lively, more active, more independent this time. But still I want to be loved by people whom I love.

Computers..as smart as you want them to be..

I should start with a warning. Computers are made to help human beings but they do so till you use your mind. Once you start behaving like a dog to it, it will do the same to you. A warning, never select all the files together for Shift Delete. Check once before you take this drastic step. Trust me shit happens.
I had numerous numbers of files saved on my desktop, mostly the ones on which I was working on currently. And 90% of them were important with only few of them having backup. I was just checking them one by one and was simultaneously transferring photos from my mobile to laptop and vice versa. Songs were on VLC player and was also copying the files on a pen drive. So technically, lots of things were happening simultaneously. When you are doing something like that, just forget to reorganize things because that what I thought and I am in deep shit now. I copied some files here and deleted some from there. The process continued till I accidently opened the ‘Recently changed’ folder and saw that most of the icons were shortcuts so better to delete them as they might be affecting the system performance. Selected all and SHIFT DELETE. Boom!!!!
Once I came back on the desktop I realized that few files were missing. As those files (which were not in a folder on desktop) were less important, I was ok. I then opened the ‘Draft Blog’ folder in ‘My documents’ and both the important blogs were missing. Came back on desktop and opened the important folders, Damn, all the latest files were missing. Suddenly I realized that I did some real stupid act. Ideally I should not have been writing about this on this blog, but then I want you to act little smart unlike me. Now looking for software to recover. Pray for me!!!

Miss someone and create this..

It was raining outside. I sat and tried calling few people. Two of them were in office so could not talk much and one, to whom I wanted to talk most desperately, didn’t pickup. I am not blaming anyone here, but this incident pushed me to think. Think as to why things change in life, why distance changes relationships and how it happens.
There are two complementary theories. I am defining them complementary to begin with but ultimately they will turn out to be supplementary.
The first one says, “Distance strengthens a relationship, love grows stronger”. When I say love, I am taking the most general sense of it not the typical boyfriend girlfriend type but general as in love between friends. And the second one goes like, “Out of sight, out of mind”.
To analyse these theories, we understand that distance is the key driver while there are two possible outcomes, one on either side of the spectrum. One leads to a happy ending where Raj and Simran would almost run into each other when the meet after six months while the other leads to a Ghazni type ending where Simran would even not remember who Raj was. Why and how does it happen?
Every relationship follows a cycle. Relationship initiates, grows stronger, stagnates, declines and then ends. Ends is not necessarily announced but happens when communication level goes to null. The initial two phases of this cycle are the most important nodes which defines as to how long or small the stagnation graph (period) can be and fast or slow the decline would be. Let’s take an example of two casual friends, a boy and girl, who work at office together and go out on few weekends together along with other friends to malls etc. If they do not have a lot of things in common or if they do not intentionally try to build a strong relationship, though there will be an initiation but the growth would be so weak that the stagnation phase would be very small and the decline would be extremely fast when they separate. This process gets a catalyst is either one of them gets a partner to fill the vacuum. So “Long time, no see” become “Long time, Don’t want to see”. On the other hand if they intentionally try to understand each other, develop a bond wherein they feel safe and happy in each other’s presence and their being together becomes a need for both of them, the outcome will be completely different. Their bond would grow stronger with distance and the reunion would be more passionate.
HUH!! I know it’s enough of HRish shit for the day. It was just that I was missing someone. Missing very badly so came up with this. Never mind...Chill is the word. You chill; even I will try doing that.
But before I finish for the day, one interesting line that I listened somewhere....
What ultimately defines a relationship is another relationship....agree??

Raashee

Why look for happiness outside when you can find it within. Funny huh!!! You will easily find such lines in Robin Sharma’s stupid motivational books or the Banyan Tree column of TOI. Most of the times, even I don’t care to either comprehend or even read such lines. But of late few things happened to me which kind of changed my perception.
Mid semester exams were on and I had already appeared for eight papers. One last was left. Six of us, the six most useless people assembled at institute building to discuss the contents of this last paper so that all of us pass. As even my condition in that paper was not very strong, I was fully ready to participate. And please don’t interpret that I was good at other papers, I was bad at almost all of them, it was just that this paper was just too haunting and I had already missed all the surprise tests. But before we could have started, my mom called me up and informed that my bhabhi was blessed with a baby girl. Now that was some news. For a moment the child in me woke up. I wanted to be at home and play with the baby. But the very next moment, the real I came into being. I enquired about arrangements, the hospital cleanliness, bhabhi’s health and a lot of other things. I went back to the assembly to discuss the paper, tried hard to concentrate but somehow could not for most of the times.
The very next day everyone was talking about summer placements. We were informed that some companies were lined up during the holidays and it is advised to stay back. For once, I thought of staying back. The thought was, cannot risk placements. If I go home, I might miss a chance. But then the baby girl was too strong a reason to go back home. And to be truthful here, someone else was also responsible here for my going home. And I am very thankful to that person for taking strong decisions and pushing me also to go back. I would have surely missed something had I not come home that day.
I, along with my brother, reached Bokaro at 12 in the night and the door of the nursing home where the baby was, was closed. So dad, bro and me went back home. The eagerness to meet the baby, see her, touch her grew even stronger. The next day, woke up at time and went to the nursing home to surprise people (My home coming was not known). I entered the room, and I suddenly realized I was in for a surprise, that now I was no longer the youngest member of my family. The first look of the child. It was not the first time that I was looking at a 1 day old baby, but then she was special. She was my brother’s daughter. My parents’ first grandchild. The first girl child of gen next of my family.
She came with a lot of changes. My bro became a father. Father, now that is some responsibility. Being a father meant that all the existing bonds from my bro to other family members grew a bit weak suddenly and she created the strongest bond with him at one go. I felt jealous. But she deserves that. My mom and dad became dada and dadi and suddenly started appearing a bit older to me. I became a chacha. Yet to figure out the responsibilities barring few known ones that I do daily like changing her dress when she pees or preparing milk for her or even singing for her to make hep sleep. But most importantly, my Bhabhi became mother. She is almost my age and we are more like friends. And I guess I am more mature than her but as soon as she became a mother, all the idea of I being more mature or sincere broke.i thought that as a mature individual, I can at max change a process, add profits or own a company but she just gave birth to a new life. A new life that can breathe, drink, cry, make noises and has a capability to grow. A new life which is so delicate that you are afraid to even touch her but still so attractive that you cannot stop yourself from doing that. Her eyes were closed when I first held her. Tongue was rolling and arms were folded tightly within. She was sleeping and there was no movement, but even then she was so attractive that I kept on staring at her. It was after some 30 minutes that she opened her eyes. I thought she was looking at me but it was the tube light that she was more interested in. She kept rolling her eyes for some time and then slept again. I was there with her for the next four hours and every small move of hers caused the same excitement as it did at the first sight. While coming out I realized that for the time I was with her, I did not think of anything other than her and happiness just paved in her path without me looking for it.

Two days...complete contrast

Two days...exactly opposite to each other.
As the exams are fast approaching, studies has soared up the ladder in the terms of priority of life at this point of time. I have been skipping a lot of things to create some extra time for studies but sadly mostly ended up sleeping and not studying.
Yesterday came with a similar choice. Pt Hariprasad Chourasi, The Padma Vibhusan Flute player was playing at Kalidas Auditorium in the campus. PD was very excited about it. I was not, as I wanted to study. But then something happened, may be I thought that I would be able to write a blog on this and listening to him would be a life time experience. So finally PD cope rope in three of us to join him to the concert. I appreciate his efforts because it was raining heavily outside and I would have not gone out in those conditions for anything. So finally four of us reached the auditorium, completely wet (wet as in drenched, don’t think otherwise). Sat there for 15 minutes and realized that though he was great but we still have not developed a taste for classical. We came out and it was raining even worse. But then riding was fun apart from the fact that I almost lost my mobile and wallet to the rain. Later in the night I realized that I did a right thing by going there. I realized that at least I will not spend my hard earned money in future to attend such concerts. But the day as a whole was happy.
Today being a holiday again, woke up late, ate, tried to study and slept again. It was evening when I realized that everyone else was studying and I was an exception. But who cares. One of our Rich and Awesome professors threw a dinner party for all the students and faculty members. It was raining again. Almost the whole batch made it to the party. I have been a public person all through my life. But frankly speaking, I am changing now. I did not like lots of things. I was feeling as if I am just acting laughing there. As if I should not have been there. And the strangest thing about all this is that one of my closest friends here felt the same way. I don’t know if this is because weather or something else but if two people are feeling the same negative vibes then there is something wrong, for sure. I am just hoping that it’s not too bad.
No net connection in hostel today. So will post in tomorrow. Watched two episodes of HIMYM and a episode of Sex and the City and I am feeling so fresh. Thanks Robin, thanks Barney, thanks HBO.